wow, i think she's superwoman.

i was going home on tuesday night when some girl in a pj '09 orientation tee walked into the lift.
in my head, i was like, "haha. i'm not the only pj idiot living in this block!".
then my next thought was, "woah. freak mann, it's almost ten. why's she out so late?"
upon observing that she was armed with a shoebag, i figured she was from canoeing.
another random thought hit me, "mann. she looks tough. scary. but at least she said thanks."
and then the lift stopped at the 10th floor and out i went.

being the bo liao boy that i am(i'm trying really hard to be busy, but honestly, reading about quantum physics on wikipedia is not at all interesting), i decided to bloghop around and i found her blog. mann, i swear she's a machine.

she's in canoeing and drama. like holy crap. 2 CCAs?!
and she's a homework freak(couldn't find a better replacement word).
and from the looks of it, perhaps a perfectionist. or at least it seems that she's trying.

but for a perfectionist, or the machine that i think she is, it's funny to note that the Les Choristes OST is on her wishlist(she should just download the nice songs and leave out the rest. but that's gonna be hard cos almost everything is nice).

just in case you were wondering, i am not a stalker.
i am merely satisfying the human faculty that they refer to as curiosity.
and if boredom's a good excuse, i'll throw that in too.

overload.

stay cool.
when you're running too fast,
hit the brakes.
and start again.

focus.

don't wanna let it go to waste.
don't wanna just sit back and watch everything i've built crumble.

it starts now.

Envision with our eyes,
and keep within our hearts,
the path to tomorrow.
And on that path, we'll fight.

give me strength.
i'm clearly not ready for the tasks ahead.

wish i'd knew why.

blood is the currency of the soul and the blueprint of one's will.

i've faltered again.
i'm sorry.

if only you knew.

just because a person doesn't show up for matches, it doesn't mean he's not loyal to the team.
or just because he doesn't turn up for training anymore, it doesn't mean he no longer loves the team.
sometimes, there are things and people that are more important than the team.
so please don't question my loyalty and love because i believe i've given almost everything i've had for the team;
blood, sweat and bones. and perhaps, a few tears.

and don't you feel that sucky feeling too?
you want to play badly too don't you.
i really wonder how you can sit through all those matches.
i really do.

yes, they're plate champs. and i heard they're on TV.

i'm feeling real sore about it.
i could have played. should have.
maybe i should have just gone back in again.
maybe i should ignored my SOB shoulder and claimed my rightful place in the team.

maybe.
just maybe.

it's all over now anyway.
the rest have all become legends while i'm still nothing.
they can go back next time and proudly declare that they were from the plate champion batch.
when juniors ask me which batch i was from, what position i played and all, the most i can do is just smile .
there's no glory in proclaiming and boasting about something you didn't do. but i still feel this tinge of regret. i hate it.
but there's nothing i can do now.
after all, what's done is done.
congrats to the 2nd plate champion batch and kudos to jj for putting up a good fight.

could have done more.
could have.
should have.

2 steps forward and 1 step back.

why does it feel like i'm going around in circles?
like i'm going nowhere?
is this how it should be?
i don't know, how bout you tell me.

i'm beginning to dislike uncertainty.
and promise.
and maybe hope too.
cos from down here, things are looking really bleak.

am i really at the end of the road?
i'm not sure.
i'm not making any real progress.
at least that's what the grade cards say.

i guess we don't always get what we want

other times,
i feel like it's all for nothing.
all the pretence.
just to keep pace with everyone else.

it's not what you tell the world that's important
but rather,
what the world tells you.

yeah. that and the end result too.

plate finals.

all the best guys.
i guess all our hard work has paid off.
this is the real test;
to show 'em how far we can go.

wish i could be there on the field with y'all.
perhaps, another time?
'tis not for me to decide.
after all, time will tell.