thinking back.

it's been two years now.

i don't really miss you all the same.

let's just say it's been awhile

oh, look at you now.

so different.

so distant.

maybe i shouldn't have said what i said.

or maybe i shouldn't have done what i did.

but the words have been spoken.

and the deeds, done.

and now there is little to do

and naturally, little to say.

perhaps you're better off that way.

well, all i can do is pray;

that you'll do well all the same.

and that perhaps someday you'll remember my name.

simply put,

the girl i hold dear

is the one i knew from yesteryear.

i suppose this is what teenagers like myself call "emo-ing". it's interesting to see how people have changed over the years and all. but at the same time, it's painful to be at a feast but not be able to sit at the table. that's what it felt like that night. i'll just take it as a reminder to not be such an ass next time. if there is ever a next time.

i guess i should keep looking forward and stop thinking back about all these memories. time of year i suppose. merry christmas(yes, i can smell the irony) to you, whoever you are.